Things I Learned From Lorraine Crea

When I was about twelve, I remember being at my Grandma and Grandpa Crea's house and being hit by the notion that they could, one day, pass away. I remember thinking about it all day, consumed by the thought that two people, who had such a steadfast existance in my life, would not be there any more. Before we headed home, I sat down at the organized chaos of my Grandpa's desk, and wrote them each a short letter, telling them how much I loved each of them, and instructing them not to die. I left each of their notes on their pillows, and went on with my pre-teen life. Sadly, now is the time where I no longer have to wonder what it will feel like to not have any living grandparents. I can easily call to mind the picture of their faces, the warmth of their hugs, and the small tics that made them, them. But I know that some day it won't be quite so easy.

My grandma, Lorraine Crea, was a wonderfully unique and incredibly warm person. She was unique in the sense that she was who she was...strong, sharp-witted, faith-filled, loving and refined, and, at least in the eyes of a granddaughter, never felt the need to change who she was. I learned so many things from her. Between her and my dad, I learned the importance of family history...the wonder and depth in stories told from those who came before me. I learned the enjoyment in a Disney movie, in an old western, in an old classic movie, in a good book, and in a game of cards. I learned that you get a better response from your husband by sending out grandkids to call him in for lunch than by standing by the door yelling, "Rocco!"

I learned about the kind of relationship I want to have with my spouse, my children, and my grandchildren. She never tired of doing things with us. There were special times when only I came in to stay with her to help prepare for Christmas. There was Christmas Eve with them every year, and stockings and family gifts on Christmas Day. There were special times alone with my grandparents at Rose Lake...and the times there with our entire extended family. The times we all went out to eat. All the delicious meals she made. The smell of Elizabeth Taylor's White Diamonds. Sitting and chatting with her in the evening and watching Grandpa's head droop lower and lower as he fell deeper and deeper asleep. There are so many memories, and they keep popping into my mind at random times, stopping me, and making me catch my breath.

One of the things I love the most, is the knowledge that I'm not alone in my having special and fond memories. Each of my sisters, each of my cousins, my aunts, my uncles, my parents, my extended family, have memories like these, some shared and some incredibly personal. That's the grandmother, the mother, the wife I want to be. She shared her love, in many different forms, with many different people.

There are days, sometimes more frequently than others, where I become momentarily overwhelmed by my life, by the demands of being a wife and mother, and it gives me pause. But I always do the same thing. I take a deep breath. I say a quick prayer for calm and patience. And I always think of my mother and grandmothers. These women, who had many more children than I, with harsher societal demands, without the modern day conveniences I am afforded. I stop and think of these marvelous women, who did what I do, with so much less. And I am humbled, and filled with awe. Thank you to all these marvelous women before me, who have taught me the kind of person I wish to be. I love you so, so much, Grandma.

Below are pictures with my Grandma, in no particular order...



With my Grandma and Grandpa Crea, at Rose Lake, as I left for college. (August 1999)


With my Grandma and Grandpa Crea, on my college graduation day. (May 2003)


Grandpa and Grandma Crea, at Rose Lake. (7-4-08)


Grandma and Grandpa Crea, on Brad and I's wedding day. (8-21-04)


Rocco and Lorraine Crea. (1993)


Grandpa and Grandma Crea at Rose Lake. (Summer 1994)


Grandma, Mom, Aunt Liz, Aunt Jeanne, and Aunt Pauline, at Grandma and Grandpa's house. (1995)


Playing cards at Rose Lake (left, and around the table: Cathy, Grandma, Great-Aunt Mary, Lauren, Liz, myself.) (Summer 1999)


Grandma, holding Brendan, with Brad and I. (October 2007)


Grandma, holding a newborn Brendan. (July 2007)


Uncle Larry, Uncle Greg, Aunt Liz, Dad, Aunt Pauline, Grandpa and Grandma.


An old Crea family photo, on a hay-ride. Grandma is in red in the front.


The Crea family (my grandparents and great-aunt-and-uncles)


Brad and I, with Grandpa and Grandma.


Grandma and Grandpa, with my sisters and I, at Pete and Amy's wedding.


A Big Jim's picnic at Long Lake, with my sisters and Grandma.


One of my absolute favorite pictures....my Grandma Helen Adrian, my Grandpa Rocco Crea, and my Grandma Lorraine Crea, at Rose Lake.


Rocco and Lorraine Crea, and their immediate family. (Aunt Liz, Mom, Aunt Jeanne, Uncle Greg, Aunt Pauline, Grandma, Dad, Grandpa, and Uncle Larry.)


Grandma and Grandpa, walking down the aisle on their wedding day. (6-21-47)


Grandma and Grandpa, dancing on their wedding day. (6-21-47)