See the Sun through the Smog

It's sometimes challenging to see the kindness in the world.

Shootings.  Wars.  Newspapers and tv screens and webpages filled with discouraging, disheartening and painful perspectives that surround us and make it difficult to see the sun through the smog.

But I want to remind you that it's there.

Kindness.  It's everywhere.

Sometimes you have to choose to see it.  Sometimes it envelopes you.  And sometimes it jumps right in your face and covers you in kisses (like an excited puppy!)

Choose to see it.  Choose to see the sun through the smog.

It's there.

I spent almost two weeks curled up in a chair, not able to do much else besides get through my days.  And then I was blessed with a few days of feeling more like myself.  So I ran some errands (determined  for life to feel like normal.)  Normally, I put my head down and grind through those errands, my mind more on what I have to do next than on what's going on around me.  But on this day, I kept my head up and my eyes wide open.  And there was kindness, and goodness, and beauty all around me.

It was in kind words and loving thoughts at the bank and grocery store and pharmacy.  Places I frequent as a customer, but never took the time to feel a part of.  Every one of these places is like a small family, and they all took the time to show kindness and love to me.  Employees I don't know much beyond a name and a smile were crowding around registers and windows, asking about me and my family, and showering me with words of support and kindness.

It was in a loving hug and gift from a stranger in a grocery store parking lot.  From a mom, to a mom. (And you will forever be in my heart!)

It was in a knowing look and a request to pray with me.  I am not normally someone who is used to that, or even 100% comfortable in that situation...but it is love that is being shown to me.  It is a reminder that God is there, every step of my day.

It was in  Brad's employer letting him come to me at a moment's notice...whether it was to drive me to the hospital or keep an eye on me  while I was hugging the toilet or letting him entertain Emily while I had to go back to the hospital.  It was a knowing and loving look in their eyes when I thank them for this kindness, or for the meals they have provided.

It was going through one of the yuckiest procedures I could think of, but having a compassionate and loving tech by my side (who was very good at distracting conversation!)  The procedure worked and I was able to eventually feel more like myself, but what mattered just as much as that relief from pain was the comfort and care that this one person showed me during this uncomfortable time.

It was a sign written out to be posted in our entry way, reminding people to wash their hands before coming in, as we have to be extra careful about illness.  The kindness and love that is behind the thought of that sign (and the, what must by now be hundreds!) of trips to take care of us, leaves me astounded when I stop to reflect on it.

It was in the cards and messages that come my way, reminding me of my love for each one of you.

It was going online and seeing the unbelievable amount of support behind us in the form of the Meal Train and GoFundMe.  The amount of support we have gotten from all of you, my friends and family, whispers to me that I am unworthy of this unbelievable amount of love.  But I know that truly feeling that way would be a disservice to all of you, who donate and cook and write cards and say prayers.  Just know that we love you all, as much as all of this love and kindness that is showered on us.

So, please, choose to see the kindness in this world.  And shower it on others.

It is one of the best gifts there is.